The Land Of The Lost

I've yet to get a solid start date on my current "job" so I decided I would apply at a few places just in case. Then I run across a want ad for Bridgestone tires. Get this, they demand a college degree in order for you stand around a small store and sell their tires for a living! A college degree to sell tires? How would a college degree better prepare you for hawking circular hunks of rubber for a living? Or for that matter why would you go to all the trouble of getting a college degree just to end up selling tires?

I think I'll go back to school. I'll go to one of those college's that lets you major in paranormal psychology and then apply for a bunch of jobs like this. Then when I'm a manager at the Dollar Mart I can look down at my employees, many of whom will be twice my age, and proudly say "You don't have my job because you don't have college degree in something that is completely made up. That's right. I proudly make 12 thousand dollars a year riding on the back of my ghost degree". And then I will commit suicide.

Then after I have passed I want those 12 thousand dollars I earned yelling at Little Clee Tron for not putting the month old cookies in the correct isle, and have it used to build a statue. A statue of me looking boldly into the sun, a college degree in one hand, a tire in the other, and one of those ghost things from pac man at my side.

Ladies and Gentlemen the world has lost its mind. On that note here's something hysterical. Godzilla!!!!!